Teacher assessed level/mark = Level 4, 40
WWW:
- Good introduction; setting out main points well. Excellent use of embedded quotes.
- Good embedding of quotes and they are really good, it flows really nicely. Fluent and sophisticated ideas. Good use of research.
- Very good analysis and critical autonomy throughout both paragraphs.
- Extensive explanation on social element
- Good discussion of representation and stereotyping, good references to specific parts.
- Detailed analysis and plenty of references.
- Perfect bibliography, everything is in the right place and order.
EBI:
- Improve expression - keep it clear and simple! Introduce your hypothesis on the first page - what's the main difference and why?
- Some of the sentences are really long. Like the first and third paragraphs are 2 sentences.
- Sentences are stretched to the max. Its very good but also time consuming for the examiner.
- Add more historical context.
- Link to news values briefly.
- More use of theory
- Nothing to improve for bibliography- (I will keep adding regardless)
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